Adoption: We Are Done...Now We Wait
Yesterday was the big home study for our adoption process. We've been filling out paper work, reading, and attended classes for the last two months, but this was the final step in the approval process. In order to be certified, our caseworker has to first conduct individual interviews with Kris and I, and then visit our home to ask some more questions and make sure we aren't running a meth-lab or sweatshop in the garage. Usually the individual interviews take place at the Gladney offices, however, our caseworker, Tanya, arranged to do both interviews and our home study on the same day.
When we got our official date for our home study, we started the cleaning process. Got the garage all arranged, cleaned out every room in the house, set up the kids bedroom with furniture and toys, etc. The morning of our home study, we got up early and put the finishing touches on our house, doing some last minute sweeping, cleaning, and prepping. At about 9:30, Tanya showed up with paperwork in hand.
We sat in the living room, where Tanya started by asking us a series of questions. To be exact, 38 questions, ranging from basic (how long have you been married?, how old are you?, have you ever used illegal drugs?) to philosophical (how will you tend to your child's religious upbringing?, what will you do if your child likes one parent more than the other?) and then specifics about the child we are interested in (how many children?, what races?, what ages?). The first part of the interview took just over two hours, at which point we took a break for lunch. We invited Tanya to have lunch with us, and Kris made turkey salad sandwiches on toast, with grapes and chips, and bundt cake or strawberry shortcake for dessert. It was the kind of spread anyone who has come to our house and eaten has experienced, but I'm hoping that it helped show what kinds of parents we will be, even though that was not our intention.
After a nice lunch, we did the home study. While Kris and I thought that this would involve Tanya poking round our house with white gloves, we just sat in the living room again while she asked us questions (how many sqft?, do you have smoke alarms? is there a garage?). We answered all the questions, and she just jotted down the answers. She never actually saw our garage, just took our word for it. After the home study, which was the briefest part of the process, Kris left so I could do my individual interview. In this section, Tanya asked questions about my childhood memories, my parents, my sister, my thoughts of Kris, what I did for a living, and more. This was the hardest part of the interview. Personal questions are tough to answer, and when you do answer them, its hard to put feelings and memories into words. This part took about 45 minutes, and then I left so Kris could conduct her interview. Me leaving meant going back to the bedroom to take a quick nap. Next thing I know, Kris comes in and its all over. Tanya is gone, and our home study is done.
Tanya will now take our interview information and type it up. Our answers will create a source that people can learn all about us. Want to know how we will handle bed-wetting? Look in the file. Do we have a fenced in backyard? It'll tell you. Once this is all typed up, which takes about two weeks, Tanya will have the information reviewed by two other people, to see if there is anything missing that would help round out our information. This process will take about 4 weeks.
Now, we are all done for the next 6 weeks. Nothing more we can do. Our time will be filled with reading about adoption and child development, and looking at kids on the TARE website. When we get our certificate, I'll let everyone know. Once that happens, our file will be out there, and can be matched with a child.
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